


Not On My Watch

by SculptorOfBeginnings



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: F/M, NSFW, One Shot, Reader-Insert, Sad Ending, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-05
Updated: 2018-08-05
Packaged: 2019-06-22 10:17:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15579756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SculptorOfBeginnings/pseuds/SculptorOfBeginnings
Summary: Before Negan met Dwight and Sherry, he met you.





	Not On My Watch

**Author's Note:**

> This was my first smut. Thanks to my three lovely betas who shall remain nameless :)

A low whistle cut through the sound of late-night crickets, plunging the wood into silence.

 _So much for catching some sleep_ , you thought, snapping to full attention and taking in your surroundings without moving. A strange feeling settled itself in your gut as you took in the eerie lack of noise.

“Katie?” You whispered out hopefully. It echoed around the small clearing, making you curse under your breath. When there was no response from the other side of the small fire your head shot up from the backpack that had been doubling as a pillow.

 _“Katie,"_ After waiting another second in the silence you realized there was no alternative. You had to move. Jumping up silently you moved around the fire, the rock in your gut solidifying. You attempted to keep your eyes on the surrounding woods as you made your way through the flickering light, heading towards the unmoving body of your traveling companion. “Katie you’re supposed to be on watch, _wake the fuck up!_ ” A low moan from the sleeping girl made you think she was waking up, so you shook her shoulder. “Katie come on,” you plead, your voice becoming hurried. You shook the girl again.

Shock slammed through you as she finally rolled over, lifeless eyes glaring up at nothing but still moving; _searching_. Katie’s jaw was moving too, and then suddenly so was the rest of her, chest rising and hands reaching out to you lazily. You snatched yourself away before she could do any damage, a wet, throaty growl escaping from her already stinking mouth.

“Oh _Fuck_! Fuckity, fuck, fuck, _shit_ ,” You scrambled backwards and grabbed for the knife on your side as curses continued to flow much louder than you would have preferred.

After a short but terrifying scuffle your knife ended up in Katie’s temple, and you were able to notice the empty pill bottle next to the space she’d previously occupied. 

“Oh you fucking bitch,” you directed angrily at the corpse. "You couldn’t even wait till I was on watch, you—" The whistle sounded again, reminding you of what had woken you in the first place.

You quickly threw your backpack over your shoulder and tossed the fire blanket over the flames, plunging yourself into darkness. It took a moment to adjust to the blackout, your eyes struggling to cope with the quick change. You prayed that whoever was doing the whistling was suffering the same effects as you were forced to remain still and locate the threat with your other senses.

A branch snapped a few feet behind you.

You whipped around, knife up and ready to plunge into whatever skull was on its way to eat you. It took a second to register through the struggle that your upraised arm had been stopped in its tracks by a hand—a rather large, and _very much alive_ , hand.

The whistle sounded for a third time, but much quieter and directly in front of you. The stranger took advantage of his larger size and snatched you against his body.

You could feel his chest rising and falling gently against your heaving one. Adrenaline soaked every nerve as he continued to hold your arm up in his steely grip.

"Alright you got me," you whispered quietly. "Now what do you want?" A seductive chuckle was the stranger’s only reply, and it rippled electricity down your body unexpectedly.

Negan released your arm, allowing you to step back. “I was hoping you ladies might be kind enough to share that fire you had goin’.”

“It’s out and I don’t have shit else for you, dickwad. Feel free to keep moving.” 

Your eyes followed the large man as he moved through the shadows. The moonless night made it impossible to make anything out other than the sheer size of him, pushing your mind into overdrive and contemplating escape options.

“Well see, I saw what happened with your little friend just now," his voice moved into a low purr as he continued,  "And I was worried. You’re _welcome_ by the way, you’d be dinner right now if it wasn’t for me… Are you sure you don’t need a shoulder to cry on? It's ok I’m wearing leather, bring it on over.” You could feel the cockiness emanating from him now as he dared to step closer again, arms outstretched..

"I’m good thanks.”  The stiffness in you voice made him retreat, but you were realizing he might not be as much of a threat as you had first assumed.

 _Haven’t even seen this fuck’s face and I’m trusting him?_ You chided yourself angrily. _You at least gotta see his face first dummy._

“Ah well, just thought I’d ask…A guy’s gotta try whenever he finds the live ones right?” His chuckle in the dark sent shivers down your spine, and _not_ the bad kind.

“I just had to kill my friend, asshole, show some respect.” You moved further away and pulled out a small flashlight. You used the light to check for the perimeter traps Katie had supposedly set for the dead ones. Negan didn’t move, he just watched you travel silently around the clearing while keeping an eye on him at the same time.

He’d been able to see your face while you slept and found himself mildly disappointed you hadn’t accepted his offer for a shoulder to cry on, even if it had just been a bad joke. He also found it curious that you hadn’t tried to shoot him with the gun he’d seen tucked into the back of your pants. You hadn’t even reached for it, going straight for the silent knife instead. He considered that an impressive gut reaction considering the state of the world.

“You know I'm sorry if I scared you there. I’m not one for getting off on the wrong foot with women like this. I figured you wouldn’t be so creeped out if I woke you up before presenting myself.”

“Yeah, _great_ job dude.” You snatched the fire blanket from the circle of rocks and sighed in relief. The coals were still smoldering.

“I have to admit I was _not_ expecting the dead chick to get up like she did, she wasn’t bit right?… But the way you took her out I mean _DAMN_ , no hesitation. That was one _hell_ of a plot twist!” He chuckled at himself, seemingly forgetting to be quiet.

“Everyone comes back, bit or not, now _shut the fuck up_ ,” you grunted angrily in his general direction. “You want more dead ones over here? Jesus Christ."

He sat down on the dead girl’s bed-roll and placed his newly acquired bat beside him on the ground. Negan found himself smiling as he watched you build the fire back up enough to light the small area again. You hadn’t told him to leave yet, so he figured you weren’t going to.

“Do they now?" he responded, lowering his voice appropriately as he took in the new information. "I guess it seems like you can handle yourself pretty well so I won’t poke the bear. I know when not to piss off a lady.” You glared at him over the fire and sat back onto your own bedroll. The crickets slowly began to sing again.

“I have a feeling you got no issue pissing people off, much _less_ women. So what do you really want? Who are you?” The fire crackled in your eyes and he took a moment to note your posture.

You looked relaxed now, but it was obvious you were waiting for him to make a false move. 

 _If looks could kill_ , he thought grimly.

In an effort to help you see him as less of a threat he shrugged off the leather jacket, revealing the white, blood-stained shirt underneath.

“Did you not believe me when I said I just wanted to share your fire? It’s a chilly night if you hadn’t noticed.”

“No, I don’t believe you.” You pointed at his shirt with your knife and looked into his eyes across the flames. “Live or dead ones?”  You studied what you could see of his face, noting his longer hair and scruffy, lightly salted, beard. He looked like a man in his prime but his attitude was something to behold. A sudden, glaring smile showed every tooth and knocked you for a loop. _Been a long time since you saw a smile that sexy_ , your mind whispered.

“Little bit of _both_ , actually. See, I myself had an encounter like this here not too long ago. Can’t seem to keep people around for very long.” He had an odd way of enunciating words, but you felt a familiar clenching in your lower gut as your body responded, unbidden, to his voice. You did your best to ignore the sensation, to push it away firmly as you stared him down.

“Oh, you had your friend OD while on watch, putting your life in danger followed by the random appearance of a literal stranger from the woods? How serendipitous!” Your sarcasm was thick tonight, your brain trying to compensate for what your body was doing. He just seemed like a genuine asshole, radiating an undue confidence over the situation.

“Hey, I said _similar_ , not exactly the same.” The appearance hard lines across his face made you raise an eyebrow. “I just had to put down what was left of my last merry little band of assholes.”

You nodded softly as if in understanding, but really you wanted to see him better.

“Groups really don’t seem to be lasting long these days.” Negan grunted in response, his attention no longer focused on you but the fire. The cocky aura was fading, you noticed almost absently. He nodded in agreement.

“They could though, with the right strategy...” His voice trailed off thoughtfully.

“What about the creepy whistling?”

“What?! _Creepy_?” He threw you off with yet another quick mood change by looking at you with a hilariously bewildered expression. “I just wanted to wake you up before I came over here! _Pure_ self-preservation sweetheart, didn’t wanna get shot. It echoes pretty well in these woods _if_ ya hadn’t noticed so it was the best option to wake you up without pullin’ too many dead ones this way. I wasn’t sure ‘hey, howdy, how ya doin’ would work very well on a pair of sleeping chicks, being such a large and intimidating man emerging from the woods an’ all…But now that we’ve properly met I can see you got a nice big pair of lady balls in those jeans.” He paused in his mini-monologue, chewing on his next question. “Is it really a creepy sounding whistle?”

“In the middle of the night, in the woods, coming from a stranger? Duh, it’s creepy. Probably _not_ the best way to introduce yourself next time. How long were you even watching us? Obviously it was before… _this_.” You motioned weakly towards Katie’s body.

“At the risk of sounding _creepy_ ,” He sent a little glare back your way, “I’d say probably a few hours before dark. I mean _technically_ I saw you guys, scoped you out for a bit, saw what _fine_ pieces of ass you two are, well, _were_ , in her case… Then I took a walk. I came back a little bit ago and you were still here. Two pretty little birds all alone and sleeping at the same time.” He was nonchalant as he spoke of his adventures in spying on you; you weren’t sure if you should be afraid again or impressed. It bothered you to know he’d been able to see you undetected for so long.

“Ballsy move, not sleeping in shifts.” The bat was in his hands, and you weren’t sure when he’d picked it back up. He looked way too comfortable with the weapon in his hands. _And hot,_ your mind provided, siding with your body. He looked thoughtfully out into the dark woods before turning back to you. “I figured there would be more tears for your fallen comrade over there.”

“She was _supposed_ to be on watch, and it turns out it’s hard to mourn the bitch who basically just attempted to murder you via suicide.”  A short silence followed as the two of you considered your various options now that a grudging connection had been formed.

“Murder via suicide. Heh. That’s a new one. Fits though.” He pondered over you actually letting him stay without too much of a fuss. He wasn’t one to look a gift horse in the mouth, so he resolved to run with it.

“Well girly, it’s been a _shit-storm_ of long days and _longer_ nights and I have slept very few hours in-between. So I’m wondering… Can I trust you not to kill me if I take a nap? Seems like you got a pretty good one in from all the snoring before your friend and I messed you all up. And I’m still pretty sure waking you up counts as saving your life, so you kind of owe me.”

You eyed him incredulously.

“ _For real_? You’re just gonna sleep with a stranger watching over you?” Negan had already laid down, but sat back up on his elbows quickly.

“Yeah, I guess so. Nice to finally have some cushion, been a while. I might have to rub one out to relax enough to actually sleep though." He patted the bedroll with smile. "Wanna help?”

He received only a glare in return and answered it with a chuckle.

“Ah I’m just kiddin; darlin. Night night.”

With a final wink he flattened out on the bedroll, moving the dead girl’s backpack under his head. The fire had obscured your face, but he knew you were watching him. He could feel your eyes attempting to bore into his soul…

He could feel a heat that had nothing to do with the fire.

“I’ll help you with the body in the morning.”

You didn't respond, so he let the exhaustion take over.

It felt like hours before his breathing regulated, signaling that he was finally asleep. You let the fire die down almost to embers, making sure the small stone circle was enough to keep it from spreading.

A deep inhale brought with it a small amount of grief for Katie. Now that the adrenaline had faded you were able to assess the full, current situation.

You were sitting next to your friend’s corpse while a stranger slept where she had died. A frown made its way across your features before you trained your senses back to your surroundings.

_Oh Katie…You always did like to leave me to clean up your messes._

 

_\---_

 

The sun finally began it’s ascent into the Virginia sky, bringing with it the dread of a new day of fighting the dead. You had spent the night listening to the crickets and trying to meditate. Thankfully, no corpses had come in the night.

You started packing up the small amount of items that had been pulled out while making camp, carefully avoiding looking at your former friend in the rising sun. In daylight, everything seemed more real.

A soft groan interrupted the peace of the morning, breaking the surreal spell brought on by a light morning fog.

“Morning, _dickwad_. Time to go.” A thick yawn escaped his mouth as he stretched and sat up.

“Hot damn girl, _nothing_ like a good insult to get the day started. I probably should take a piss first but where we headed to?” Negan scratched his balls and shrugged the jacket back onto his shoulders before standing. You raised an eyebrow at him when he shook the sleep out of his body, taking  a few practice swings with the bat to limber up.

“Stop calling me that. And what do you mean by _we_?” You had the second bedroll tied up neatly before realizing you wouldn’t need it. Dropping it in disgust you finally looked down at Katie. “The only thing we are doing, is burning this body. After that we go our separate ways.”

“Aw come on girly, we’re both by ourselves. I was expecting two persons of female company but one will do. The apocalypse is _so_ much better with people.” He found he really didn’t want to spend the day alone as he finally caught a full view of you in the rising light. He tried not to get his hopes up on staying together, but something in your eyes told him he had a decent chance. Negan knew how to read a woman. He knew you were an angry soul…but he also knew you wanted his dick, even if you hadn’t admitted it to yourself yet. He idly wondered how long it had been since you’d been with a _real_ man.

“How about you stop calling me girly _like I fucking asked_ and I’ll think about it.” The words were out of your mouth before you could think about them. His eyebrow raised in surprise.

“A more than fair trade, I like it. Gimme a name”

“Give me yours.”

“Negan”

“Weird name… I’m Y/N”

"You don’t say… Ya know, I had a colleague named Y/N once… Wanted to screw her brains out.. And you’re a much prettier version." He finished with a wink, and you eyed his playful expression for a second before speaking again.

“Shut up. Help me move her.”

Your tone told Negan that now was no longer the time for shenanigans. His natural urge was to be a dick anyways, but instead he helped move the girl’s body over the smoldering coals in silence. You spent some unnecessary time arranging flowers around Katie, and Negan took the hint. He moved to the edges of the little camp without a word, trying to ignore your stifled tears.

 

\---

 

It was over a week of walking and resting mostly in silence before you reached a strip-mall in a different town than he’d found you in. The tension between had been thick but somehow comfortable, even with you speaking only when spoken to. Negan _never_ shut the fuck up, but he only addressed you directly on occasion. You sighed heavily at the sight of more dead people in the windows.

“That one,” Negan said, pointing out a boarded up fitness center with his bat.

“All this walking hasn’t been exercise enough? The last thing that place is going to have is a decent fucking kitchen.” He chuckled for the first time in days. Your somber attitude had been infectious, but he had a good feeling now.

“Have you never been to a gym? Might be a vending machine full of protein bars or muscle milk or something. Maybe even showers. Ugh, _showers_ Y/N just picture it! Ohhh, or a _pool_.” He waggled his eyebrows salaciously at you in an effort to see a smile. It almost worked, so he turned and headed towards the back of the building whistling a merry tune and twirling his bat.

“Jackass,” You mumbled grumpily at his back, eyeing the way his pants were hugging so tightly in all the right places.

“Heard that.”

 

\---

 

“Hot _DAMN_ there’s actually light in here too!” You both stared down into the large pool. Somehow the light was still on, shining into the crystalline depths in an incredibly inviting way.

“Jesus _fuck_ Neganwhy are you always so loud? It’s like you _want_ us to die.”

“Hey, relax woman, we’re alright for the first time in weeks” You glared at him for the millionth time since you had met, but knew he was right. You were on the second floor, protected by a series of doors the dead ones would never be able to open.

“Fine, but we’re checking those locker rooms over there just like we did everything else in here before we get comfortable.”

You found only one monster out of all the rooms leading off the pool.

“Alright _asshole_ , I’ll go ahead and say it…You were right, I think it might be safe to take a swim.” You couldn’t help but laugh at his shocked expression. “What? We’re covered in blood from all the health nuts we just slaughtered and everything seems to be locked up tight. It’s been over a month since my last shower. Let’s do it.”

“You're right…That pussy has GOT to be _rank_.” You took the vulgar comment in stride.

“Oh fuck off, your dick probably sinks way worse.” He laughed heartily

“You know, you may be right.” He dropped the bag he had and took off his clothing. You were momentarily thankful he opted to leave on his boxers before jumping in… They probably needed cleaning the worst. You quickly shrugged off your backpack and followed suit.

 

\---

 

“How long do you think we’ve been here?” You asked from your spot on the edge of the pool, studiously ignoring the smooth way his muscles flexed as he moved through the water. You were munching happily on a protein bar Negan had found lingering in a vending machine and hoping your staring hadn’t been obvious.

“Few hours at least,” He showed off his wrinkly fingers before trying to tickle one of your feet under the water. “Do you think we should spend the night?” You lifted your leg and made like you were going to kick him. Negan backed up and splashed water up at you when you didn’t answer his question. You wiped your face on your arm and rolled your eyes.

“What are you, ten?”

“Ooh _nice one_! What are you? _Eighteen_?” His eyes glittered up at you mischievously. You cleared your throat awkwardly as your gut clenched, bringing with it a flood of heat straight to your center. He looked so god-damned beautiful all wet. Fighting your attraction to him while on the road had been hard enough, but now? 

Both of you were near naked and you were _definitely_ feeling the effects. So far you’d managed to hide your reaction to all his dirty jokes and innuendos, but this time he seemed to sense your positive reaction and moved back closer to you.

You stood and dusted your hands off before he was close enough to touch. Negan openly enjoyed the eye-full as you sauntered to the windows on the other end of the pool. _God damn thong during the apocalypse…My kinda woman,_ he thought, watching your round ass cheeks bounce lightly, the thin strip of fabric between them peeking out with every step you took. He adjusted the growing problem in his boxers before getting an idea on how to warm up your attempts at a chilly attitude. As you opened one of the curtained windows just enough to see the street below, he silently exited the pool.

From the second floor you could see the entire strip mall and some way down the road. “Good sight lines, we can see both directions…This place is a ghost town right now but the sun is going down. That might change” You closed the curtain and held it for a moment to keep it from swaying and possibly signaling anything outside. When you turned back around you landed straight into his slick, still-glistening chest, and it pulled a surprised but throaty gasp from your lips.

 _How did I not hear him?_ He caught your shoulders, acting as a stabilizer before you could fall into him completely.

“Whoa there cowgirl, I just wanted a peek.” His grin was of the shit-eating variety when he looked down at you, sucking you right in just like it had the first time he’d leveled it on you.

“N-Nothing to see, just a view of an empty street.” You screamed internally, enraged when you couldn’t control your body heating up and pressing into his. Your breath quickened and caught in your throat as he pulled you the rest of the way against him, letting you feel how just how hard he was from your unintentional show.

“Oh I saw plenty, and it was a nice view.”

 _Be mad, say something bitchy_ You urged yourself, but you found you were unable to speak.

Instead, you stared up at him, forcing yourself to meet his eyes and read the intentions there. He’d been hitting on you off and on the entire time you’d been together, but after some time you figured that was just a defense mechanism for him.

Most of it was playful considering you didn't answer ninety percent of his shit, but this wasn’t even an _actual_ proposition…He wasn’t bragging about his dick or the various skills he had, or even trying to convince you. It just…felt like an invitation he’d been waiting on you to answer that you were just now receiving. _Loud and clear,_ you thought as his hard length pulsed between you, only the wetness of his boxers and your panties acting as a barrier.

 _Join the party, babydoll,_ his lips invited, eyes twinkling down at you and coaxing an easy smile to your face.

His expression was inscrutable for once, but it was intense as he ground his body almost imperceptibly into yours. A thick gasp betrayed your reaction to him so you allowed your eyes to fall shut and let yourself just feel.

 _Knew it,_ he thought smugly. The realization that you knew he wasn’t fucking around this time made him twitch against the thin fabric holding his cock in place. The friction helped spread his mouth into an answering smile. 

Before he could say anything to ruin the moment your hand was on the back of his neck, pulling his head down to meet yours.

Your kiss was rough, and he felt like you were trying to suck his soul from his mouth. He was happy to let that happen and accepted your probing tongue, a groan of his own escaping as he returned the kiss. He hadn’t felt a woman in way too long, and your body sang to him, hitting all the right notes.

He almost couldn’t believe it when you jumped and wrapped your legs around his waist, leaving your covered clit pressed right against the throbbing tip of his erection. Negan wasn’t missing this opportunity and immediately grabbed your ass to help hold you up and grind you down. Answering the action with a moan you rolled your body against his, helping him rub your clit deliciously against him. He growled, biting your lip a little harder than necessary as he pressed you back into the wall. You raked your hands through his wet hair, spurred on by the nip.

“Hold on,” he murmured, moving away to pull at your clinging shirt. You whined, huffing at him in mild irritation. You cooperated despite the annoyance at the interruption, taking the opportunity to catch your breath and take in the sight of his muscular chest. You clenched your legs tighter around his waist and pulled yourself back to his mouth the second your arms were free. He carried you with ease to the steps of the pool, chest pressed tightly against yours. The rough terrain of his chest hair against your soft nipples made them pebble up as he waded into the water gently. He sat you on the edge of the pool and looked lustfully up into your eyes. Having him below you like this sent an unexpected rush of slick to your core, the sensation pulling a soft gasp from you as you tried to rub your thighs together even though he was between them.

“You sure 'bout this sweetheart?” His fingers played on the edges of the black thong you wore, still seemingly uncertain of your willingness. His mouth was level with your nipples, but he wasn’t touching you. He looked at them appreciatively, his breath rushing gently over first one, then the other with agonizing slowness. Electric shocks surged through your body straight to your clit with every puff of air. His serious eyes pleaded with you to say yes, but his mouth was daring you to say no as his tongue peeked out from being caught between his teeth.      

“Yes,” was your whispered reply, unable to believe he really needed you to confirm this feeling between you.

"Here I was thinking you were a cold fish." He roughly fisted his hand in your hair and pulled you down for another kiss. His dark eyes raked over you when he stepped back, and he had to bat your hands away playfully when they reached for him.

He took a second to soak up the gift he was receiving, his hand finding its way down under the water to palm the ache he was feeling. Negan loved the way your hair was falling around your face, the lust filling your eyes, the ragged breaths that shook your chest so raggedly for him… He couldn’t believe his luck, and he definitely couldn’t wait to feel every inch of you.

"I don’t know about a fish, _Baby_ , but I _am_ getting cold." Your voice rumbled through the tension, dripping with sex as it moved over the water. Your hand rose softly to your neck as he watched you, before trailing it’s way down with teasing slowness until you found what you were looking for. You back arched into your own touch, your fingers pinching your nipple and cupping your hand around the bottom of your breast.

"Oh it’s baby now, is it?" He questioned, lust filling his voice and making it husky. His sharp intake of breath and wrist twitching under the water gave you the confidence to continue farther south, his eyes devouring the sight of your hand trailing smoothly over your stomach, down your hips and coming to rest on the soft fabric of your panties. You easily found your clit under them and pressed lightly down, enjoying the soft pressure.

His jaw worked as you rolled your clothed mound against your fingers, unleashing a moan that was the hottest sound he’d ever heard you make. Unable to contain his hands anymore he rushed forward and sent water splashing up around you.

Immediately, his mouth was moving down your naked torso. His thick, hungry lips following the exact path your hand had taken moments before. He pulled you to the edge of the concrete, thanking whatever god there was for a ledge to rest his elbows on. When he finally reached the sweet spot where your fingers were working diligently he realized you were trembling. He chuckled appreciatively, watching you edge yourself higher with every circle of your finger. He placed a strong hand over yours, forcing your hand to stillness.

The pressure of his hand on yours was too soft, too torturous and you rutted against it, begging silently for some friction. No one had touched you since long before the apocalypse happened, and you felt like you were already set to explode.

"Nuh, uh, uh baby girl, not yet. Let this one go, trust me." You released a heavy breath you didn’t know you’d been holding, whimpering as you released all your tension, allowing the budding orgasm to fade right along with it.

After watching the waves of pleasure on your face for a minute he finally granted you mercy, lowering his mouth and closing it over your clothed pussy. He reached his hands up to toy with your nipples, squeezing them harder at your insistence.

His tongue and lips lapped hungrily at you through the fabric as your moans grew louder, your hips rolling harder.

"Negan," you gasped, fingers lacing back into his hair and letting your moans become mewls of unadulterated pleasure. One of his hands moved to accompany his mouth down below, and he used two fingers to slowly peel the  barrier away from your body and down your legs. He was only away from you for a second, but it felt like eternity before he brought his body back to yours.

He picked your legs up, placed your feet on the ledge by your ass and pushed your knees apart. The new position left you fully exposed to his probing gaze and fingers, but there wasn’t a hint of shyness from you.

"Oh _yeah_ ," He hissed as his eyes found yours. He sank down into the water, stopping when his face came level with your sex. The scent of chlorine didn’t seem to matter as he gently pried your lips open to dip a finger inside. " _Fuck_ babygirl, so wet already." Two slow pumps were all it took to coat his finger completely. His groan was pornographic as he twisted his wrist and crooked his finger right into your sweet spot.

An involuntary squeak snuck past your lips and he smirked.

"Been a while, huh? Fuck you’re so _tight_ ," If your eyes had been open or your brain working properly you would have mouthed off. Instead you reached a hand towards his head and tangled it into his hair.

"Yes, yes please," the needy whine was music to his ears, and he rewarded you by finally closing his mouth over the naked, swollen bud at the apex of your thighs and sucking lightly. He only teased you for a second before he was mouthing at you like a hungry cat at a bowl of cream. The sounds he was pulling from you were heaven, drowning out all thoughts of the dead as a second finger slid inside of you with ease.

The pressure in your nerves was building again as he coaxed you higher, sucked you harder and beckoned your orgasm into his mouth.

Your head rocked back and forth as you held him in place, riding his face until the coil finally snapped, sending you careening over the edge of bliss.  You rocked into his face with no care for his ability to breathe, feeling his beard digging into your thighs and fingers scissoring inside of you as you rode out your pleasure with a scream.

When you finally let him go you collapsed backwards, still twitching with aftershocks.

"Holy fucking _shit_ Negan…" You lay still, glorying in the afterglow of the first orgasm you hadn’t given to yourself in over a year. Your body was flooded with a warm fuzzy haze you never wanted to end. You felt him kissing his way back up your naked body but couldn’t find the energy to move.

“Now who's loud?” He asked, showing his cheeky side again.

"Fuck you," you replied as your hands reached for his broad shoulders, pulling his heaviness on top of you. You smiled when you realized he had already taken off his boxers. The length of his erection slid easily against your leg, feeling much larger than it had under the wet boxers.

Your eyes were on fire when you opened them finally, and his smile matched how you felt.

“I think your facial hair made that even more amazing.” His chuckle was loud and sexy as he pressed his lower body against you, itching for some friction of his own.

“That’s a _man_ for you, babydoll.” He surprised you by standing up. 

You moaned unhappily but found yourself impressed by the actual size of his cock as it jutted proudly from the dark thatch of hair between his legs. You felt the overwhelming urge to wrap your lips around it; to feel the velvet covered steel as it plunged into your throat and coated your tongue with his taste.

He must have seen the hunger in your eyes because he chuckled again and helped you to your feet. He reached around to grab your ass with both hands and pulled your fully naked bodies together for the first time. His voice was lower and huskier than it’d been before.

“Let’s use a chair for this next part, hmm?”

“Or a towel at the very least, the concrete was kind of rough and I don't know if you could handle it like I did” Your snarky smile made his cock twitch between you, reminding you of how bad you wanted to feel him inside of you in any way possible.

When you turned to lead him to one of the pool chairs he felt the twitch became a full on throb. Watching your ass jiggle had him imagining how it would feel to slide himself between the pale cheeks he had just held in his hands.

“ _Damn_ girl,” He said as you pushed him down onto the laid-back chair.

“ _What_ did I tell you about calling me that?” You purred seductively, falling softly into the chair across his lap. Your mound was so close to him he could feel the heat pulsing out of you and onto his hardened length. You bent over, wet hair trailing his face and chest and sending chills throughout his body. You giggled when you felt his cock bounce up between your legs.

“Sorry _Y/N_ ," he returned pointedly.

"Thats better baby," your warm breath caressed his ear driving him into a frenzy. He pulled your mouth to his, his tongue no longer content to play defense as he ravaged your mouth. You went with the kiss for a moment, moaning as you licked the taste of yourself out of every crevice. You finally decided other areas of his body needed attention as his cock bounced up against your slick heat again.

He offered a groan when you finally moved down to the ultimate goal. You closed your mouth tenderly over the head of his throbbing cock, allowing your tongue to explore the hard ridges around the mushroomed head.

You moaned hungrily as you slid your mouth down, the vibrations moving through your hand while you worked your way to having him slicked up. When he reached the back of your throat there were still more inches to go. You used your hand to wet the rest of him, pressing a finger down against his sac. His sharp intake of breath and slight rise of his hips encouraged you to continue. You sucked hard as you came up, using your tongue to press circles along the sensitive underside of him as you went. His hips lifted completely off the chair as you found a steady rhythm with your mouth and hand. He pulled your hair into a ponytail so he could watch you suck his hard cock into your greedy mouth,

“ _God damn_ you’re hot,” he groaned thickly. Your head came up suddenly, your mouth leaving him with a distinctive 'pop’ that left him feeling as needy as you had been before.

“I bet you say that to all the girls with your dick in their mouth.” Your smile was big enough to match his own as you positioned yourself over him, using your hand to slide the tip of him through your slick and tease it across your slit.

“Oh honey, I don’t let girls put my dick in their mou—“ he cut off with a loud moan that mingled with yours as you sank down on him.

“Good answer” you panted out, bracing yourself against his chest to try and adjust to his large size. You sat up on your knees, giving yourself a second before pressing the rest of the way down. "Oh fuck," you whispered as he bumped almost painfully into your cervix, bottoming out and filling you completely.

His hands snagged at your hips and his head fell back, a grunt escaping from his lips. When you didn’t show any signs of moving he jerked your hips forward, sliding your clit roughly against him. You keened softly as he began a slow back and fourth motion, pulling him deeper than you’d thought possible and grinding that bundle of nerves until it had you lighting up with pleasure all over again. His hands found their way up your ribcage, letting you take over and roll your hips. It didn’t take long for you to start riding him at an increasingly frantic pace. His hands found the delicious mounds on your chest, and he toyed with you until he couldn’t take it anymore.

With a low grunt he picked you up and flipped you onto your back without pulling out. Your nails scraped his chest on the way down, leaving deep scratches. He paused when you sat up to lick the small drops of blood pooling around one of them.

  “Ho-ly shit. That was _freaky_.” He grabbed your hips with bruising strength and thrusted, hitting against every nerve and sweet spot you had. Your eyes rolled back as you moaned in delight. He couldn’t believe you’d licked his blood like a fucking vampire… But somehow, in the moment, it was the sexiest fucking thing he’d ever seen.

    “Harder Negan,” You whimpered, your voice seeming far away as he began pounding into you in a brutal rhythm. Your words and cries were lost in the background as his orgasm worked its way up. He tried to think about dead things, his grandma, _anything_ to hold it back for a little while longer.

Thinking wasn’t working so he slowed down, taking his time and pulling back completely, leaving only the head of his cock sheathed inside of you. He waited a second before pushing forward to bury his shaft as deep as it would go, grinding his hips against yours when he got there. You took his slow strokes with heavy breath, and looked up into his eyes.

“I wanted you to do this from the moment I saw you.” Your back arched, making him twitch. You squeezed his cock purposefully, trying to pull him deeper. “Please Negan, more”

"You’re beautiful when you beg."  He smoothed your hair away from your forehead, and left his hand there. He bent to steal a kiss as he started rocking into you again, his hand reaching down to pinch and toy with your over-sensitized clit. "Come with me baby," he whispered as his thrusts became harder and faster, signaling his impending orgasm.

You came right before him, your pussy spasming around him as you fell over the edge again.

He heard your sigh of disappointment when he pulled out just before he came. He didn’t even have to keep pumping his dick as he spilled his seed onto the floor beside the chair. You caught him off guard by pulling him back down before he had finished. He was helpless as you switched positions and started to suck on his softening member. Your moans of pleasure vibrated into his body and had him twitching back to life, even as he shakily moaned in protest and tried to pull you off.

“No-no-no…” His hips pressed against your mouth as you began to suck him off with abandon. There was no fighting his second orgasm: you were a harpy hell bound of pulling it from him. You felt him grab a handful of hair and expected him to pull you up.

Instead, he shoved your head down and fucked your face to completion once again, your gagging drowned out by his roar of his pleasure when he finished in your mouth. The chair shook as he dropped his weight down into it fully. You swallowed down the bit he’d managed to produce the second time around and looked up at his lazy smile.

“You look like a cat who just got caught in the cream,” He chuckled, and you grinned at his analogy.

“Too bad I missed out on the creamiest part,” His smile was genuine as he pulled you down to lay against him, both reveling in the aftershocks of your orgasms.

“You’re kind of a freak, you know that right?” Your laughter was throaty, and you sounded as satiated as he felt.

 “Yeah, you said that. You also called me a cold fish” You looked up into his eyes through hooded lashes. “Normally it’s much worse though, so you got off easy.”

“I was just being an asshole," he kissed the top of your head softly. "But I wouldn't say the getting off was easy,” he added with a chuckle. You smacked his chest.

“I guess I could be a little bit nicer to you now huh?”

“I mean that’s up to you but I am kind of an asshole so…”

You rolled your eyes lightheartedly and sat up, eyeing his boxers as they floated in the pool. “We should find somewhere to dry our clothes.”

\---

The next morning it was time to move on. With dry clothes and backpacks full of protein bars you headed out feeling lighthearted.

“So where are you actually headed?” He asked. You sighed and looked around.

“Honestly? Nowhere. I was just hoping I could wander long enough to get rid of you.”

“Is that so?” He propped the bat up on his shoulder as he looked down at your shorter frame. You nodded, shrugging in apology.

“That was the plan. Might keep you around for a little bit now though.” He gave you a knowing smile as you found your way onto the crowded interstate.

“Yeah, I was thinking the same thing about you, ya freak.”

“Hey now, you watch—“ Your words were cut off when a dead one suddenly reached out of a truck to snatch a handful of your hair. You pushed back at it's shoulders for a second before Negan came to your rescue, pulling you away and bashing the thing’s head in. You collapsed to the ground in relief, looking up at him with grateful eyes.

“Holy fuck," You smoothed your hands down your face. You could feel your heart pumping in every limb as the reality of what almost happened settled in. "That’s the closest one’s ever gotten to actually getting me… Good thing I decided to keep you around.” As he took your hand and pulled you up his smile turned to a frown. “What? Negan what's wrong?”

His words seemed caught in his throat, jaw working silently as he brushed some hair away from your face, tucking it safely behind your ear. The look on his face combined with the adrenaline was forming a knot in your stomach. "Negan what…"

“I’m so sorry,” His voice was thick with an unidentified emotion as he looked down at you.

“What?” He lifted the hand he had used to help you up. There was a rip, and blood was beginning to seep through the long sleeved shirt around your forearm.

Your heart dropped to your feet as the pain hit.

You lifted your sleeve to see the bite. It was mostly bruised, except for the one spot a tooth had torn through. Your tears came unbidden.

“No way. No fucking way. GOD DAMMIT” You threw off your backpack and began kicking cars in despair. “Shit. Fuck. FUCK”

“I’m so sorry.” His eyes spoke volumes as he watched your outburst.

“You have to put me down. Now” You didn’t miss the shock in his eyes, though he hid it quickly. His eyes searched your crowded surroundings for more dead,

“Are you serious?” He asked, quieter than he’d been since you met. You just nodded and sat on the ground, thoroughly defeated.

“Yes I’m fucking serious.” The tears were flowing freely now. “I thought I was gonna make it out here. I really did.” You sighed and tried to stop the tears. “This is it though. This is where I fucking go out.”

He pulled you up and kissed you hard, pouring every regret into it.

You melted against him, accepting the goodbye. It was wet and messy; you loved every second. You really had no choice, it was your _last_ kiss. 

“How?” He asked when you finally separated. His hands landed on your cheeks, and he wished he couldn’t feel that they were already becoming clammy.

“Knife or the bat. No gun…The dead will come for you." He held you close and pulled his knife out.

“I really don’t think I could bash that beautiful face in darlin’.” You offered a sad smile in return.

“Knife it is then… It was _almost_ nice knowing you Negan. And it was a hell of a ride.” He tried to smile back but failed, so he just pulled you into the tightest hug you’d ever had.

"You sure you don’t wanna wait it out? Maybe…"

"No Negan, we both know." You felt him nod against you as he clenched you tighter. “Thank you…” You whispered, burying your head into the shoulder of his leather jacket.

“Hey, at least you finally took me up on my original offer” You laughed genuinely, wholeheartedly.

“I did, didn’t I? Guess I needed a shoulder to cry on after all. And I guess it means we came full circle.”

“Yeah babydoll, I guess it does…Goddamned poetic if you ask me.”

“Yeah, except this poem fucking sucks.”

The world was quiet in that moment. 

You knew he had the knife in his hand.

Closing your eyes was the hardest thing you had ever done, but you managed.

“Are you sure?” Negan asked one last time. You nodded, snuggling deeper and never letting go of his waist.

It only took a second for his strong hand to push the knife into the base of your skull.

He cried then.

Not tears of love or affection, but tears of loneliness and anger. He sat holding you for longer than was safe before tucking you gently into the back seat of an open car. His eyes trailed over your face, so peaceful you could have been sleeping.

 _Why won’t they stop fuckin' dying?_   He wondered angrily as he began his journey back into the woods, alone once again.

In an epiphany, he decided it was time to stop _wondering_.

It was time to find others as strong as himself, and make _damn_ sure he didn't lose them this time.

He pictured you as you had been the night before, the smile on your face as he'd finally cracked that stony exterior just in time to watch you fucking die.

It felt cruel... Even more cruel than he was used to. To finally find a human connection in a dead world, only to have it ripped away every single time...

He imagined your face and a grim line set across his features as he made you a final promise.

"Don't worry Y/N, no one else is dyin’. _Not on my watch_."

**Author's Note:**

> Months later apology for using the phrase "velvet covered steel" LOL


End file.
